Thanks for everyone's input and feedback. I'm old and have been hauling and towing for decades so I thought I knew the answer but I'm glad I asked because it's always worthwhile to get other knowledgeable folks thoughts too, and I hadn't heard of Roadmaster Active Suspension.
One of the weaknesses of my trailer is it has a very limited cargo capacity because they should have used a heavier axle (or two) - not usually a problem as I just toss the gear in the back of the truck. I'm usually just under cargo limit with my family, gear, tongue weight and my truck has never flinched about it.
This trip though I wanted to bring an additional two adult children and all their gear along and that would have put me about 5-600lbs over cargo capacity.
I've made lots of mods and I love my truck so I'm not trading it in for a 2500 for one trip. So after this thread I was prepared to do Roadmaster Active Suspension, bilstein 5100 shocks, and some new heavy tires (only 16k on my current) and then...
I thought, ya know, they can just take their own car, 5 adult sized people is a lot for that long of a trip anyhow
Good thread, thanks all!