Common Sense?

[Zembonez]

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

 

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

 

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

 

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their spoiled and self-important children. It declined even further when schools were required to get written parental consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a Band-Aid to student s, but were restricted from informing parents when their child became pregnant and skipped class to have an abortion.

 

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses, schools were forbidden to fail students who couldn't read and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a severe beating when home owners were forbidden from using force against an attacker in their own home but the burglar was legally allowed to sue a home owner if he was injured on their property during the commission of the crime.

 

Common Sense finally died after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was actually hot and, when spilled in her lap while she was trying to drink and drive at the same time, was burned and promptly awarded a huge financial settlement in court.

 

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by four stepbrothers; I Know my Rights, I Am Entitled, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.

 

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

 

It's reported he was buried just a few stones away from Courage.

[geektoad]

Common Sense must have been a zombie, because I've seen his obituary before!

[pennzoil29]

There is so much truth to that, that I don't know where to begin. Let some of these people try to live in the 60's and 70's, when common sense was a reality. I think that should be e-mailed to every idiot out there, and a copy sent to our government. Not that it would do any good, but it is a damn good read.

[Zembonez]

Common Sense must have been a zombie, because I've seen his obituary before!

Common Sense dies an agonizing death... again and again...i

[merlin5577]

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

 

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

 

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

 

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their spoiled and self-important children. It declined even further when schools were required to get written parental consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a Band-Aid to student s, but were restricted from informing parents when their child became pregnant and skipped class to have an abortion.

 

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses, schools were forbidden to fail students who couldn't read and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a severe beating when home owners were forbidden from using force against an attacker in their own home but the burglar was legally allowed to sue a home owner if he was injured on their property during the commission of the crime.

 

Common Sense finally died after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was actually hot and, when spilled in her lap while she was trying to drink and drive at the same time, was burned and promptly awarded a huge financial settlement in court.

 

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by four stepbrothers; I Know my Rights, I Am Entitled, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.

 

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

 

It's reported he was buried just a few stones away from Courage.

 

You forgot to mention his cousins; "roll with the punches" & "get over it".

[2000DV4.8]

Ain't that da troof.

[BIGWRENCH40]

For a second there I thought you were talking about the rapper!

 

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia-

Lonnie Rashied Lynn, Jr., better known by his stage name Common (and previously known as Common Sense), is an American hip hop artist and actor.

[carneyman]

Ain't that da troof.

 

Offtrack: Dude, diggin' the new sig!

 

Ontrack: People at school have no common sense...and damn are they young and immature. Makin' me feel old way before my time!

2 guys were talking before lab today, every other word was a cuss word. Right in front of a woman. And a professor. Several of the "old" people (read: 23 and up) looked like they were ready to deck them, but of course that would have led to a lawsuit, expulsion, etc.