If a touchless car wash is having those kinds of issues, they are using the wrong chemical profile.
There are many effective products on the market that are very gentle on the surface, or clearcoat being cleaned, but very aggressive on the dirt being removed. As far as waxes getting stripped, again, the right chemicals will not affect waxes much. Besides, wax gets stripped bit by bit from rain/wind,snow, sun, washing, etc.
I never use carwashes with brushes, as they are problematic for a number of reasons.