Crushing Sadness, Then Joy (Part Two)

[TunaOnWry]

Crushing Sadness, Then Joy

 

(Part Two)

 

 

But just then, I had another brilliant idea!!

 

You know how, if you’re wrestling with the Child-Proof cap on an aspirin bottle, your best plan is to go find a seven year old?   Well, same basic idea here.   Whenever I have to re-program the VCR, I just invite my friend Shawn, his wife Janet, and their SEVEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, DEBORAH, over for beer (the beer’s for Shawn and Janet, not the seven year old).   Sure ‘nuff, before the first brew is opened, the kid has the VCR up and running again.

 

So, I call up Janet (Shawn has morning shift  this week) and, happily, the kid doesn’t have ballet class until noon!!    I explain my predicament, making sure to emphasize the economic implications for our town of losing a major auto dealership, and Janet agrees to let her daughter, Deborah, be drafted into the campaign of resetting the clocks in those GMC’s.  

 

Driving much more cautiously and conservatively than usual (I even slowed down to the speed limit as I went through the red lights), I tore over to Shawn and Janet’s place to find the agent of our chronological salvation.   “There she is, dressed up in her ballet costume, pink bows in her hair, skipping rope in the driveway.”   Janet is ready to go, so the three of us shoot back downtown where, at the GMC place, we are relieved to find that no one has committed suicide yet.  

 

Hey, you should’a been there to see the action.   Faster than the tech staff can run to keep up with her, the kid zooms around the entire lot, resetting all the clocks to Daylight Savings Time, AND throwing in a few fuel mixture adjustments of the computer settings while she’s at it.   This dealership also sells Volkswagens, but Deborah very deliberately and seriously avoided any contact with THAT brand of vehicle.  

 

The service manager and the owner were thrilled, and the General Manager offered the kid a job ($175,000 starting salary) as supervisor of their Information Technology Department right on the spot!.  Her mom nixes that idea, however, as she thinks the ballet lessons are more important.  Just then the Mayor showed up to present Deborah with a Civic Betterment Citation for having saved one of the major producers of local tax revenue from bankruptcy.  Deborah paid the Mayor no attention, being more interested in skipping rope among the Buicks.   But the owner does offer a free, brand-new vehicle to show his gratitude, so mom and the kid drive off in a shiny, Pewter 2002 Sierra 2500HD, SLT, 8.1L V8, Allison, 4.10,, 4WD, Crew, G80 Locker  -  many mods to come.

 

Having watched how it’s done, the service personnel quickly reset the clocks for all the customers GMC trucks and, now relieved of their embarrassment, they drive off once again to boast of their horsepower.

 

But where did all this leave me?  In all the excitement everyone’s clocks got reset but mine!!   The kid’s off doing pirouettes somewhere, and the staff can’t help because they decided to go get drunk in celebration of keeping their jobs.  

 

Just then, I had a yet another brilliant idea.

 

 

(To be continued in Part Three)