Jump to content

You may be addicted to the Internet, if ...

Vortec5.3

By Vortec5.3
in The Off-Topic Bar

Recommended Posts

Vortec5.3 Enthusiast

Vortec5.3

Posted
Posted

You may be addicted to the Internet, if ...

 

You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access.

 

You wake up at 2 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

 

You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape 4.0 or higher."

 

You put down your internet address when filling out your driver's license application.

 

You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

 

You laugh at people with 14.4K-baud modems.

 

You start using smileys in your snail mail.

 

The last girl you picked up was a JPEG.

 

You have engaged to someone you've never actually met except through e-mail.

 

You introduce your wife as "[email protected]" or husband as "[email protected]" and refer to your children as "client applications".

 

You name your children Mosaic, Java and Eudora.

 

You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap ... and your child in the overhead compartment.

 

Only communication in your household is through email.

 

You refuse to go to a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines.

 

All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...DSL...T1...T3.

 

And even your night dreams are in HTML.

 

You think Webster's Dictionary is a directory of Web sites.

 

You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

 

Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.

 

You have more friends on the Internet than in real life.

 

All of your friends have an @ in their names.

 

You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa but haven't spoken to your next-door neighbor yet this year.

 

You refer to your age as 3.x.

 

You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.

 

You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.

 

You really did ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.

 

There is an I.V. stand next to your mini tower.

 

Choice between paying AOL bill and paying for kids education is easy -- if a little painful for your kids.

 

AT&T names you Customer of the Month for the third consecutive time.

 

Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

 

You have to install a second phone line just so you can call Pizza Hut.

 

You hide the bill from the spouse because you may have to sell the family car to pay it.

 

Your wife drapes a wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.

 

Batteries in the TV remote now last for months.

 

You hire a housekeeper for your home page.

 

New mail alarm on your palmtop annoys other churchgoers.

 

Your mouse-clicking forearm rivals Popeye's.

 

Your household pets mimic the soundblaster card for attention.

 

You unsuccessfully try to download a pizza from www.dominos.com.

 

You try to order a movie from Blockbuster video by downloading it at 44,000 BPS.

 

You get hundreds of comments posted for you at EBay.com.

 

You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

 

You can't call your mother ... she doesn't have a modem.

 

You tell the taxi driver you live at http://1100.sunset.ave/mansion/brick.html

 

You're upset because an obituary fails to mention the deceased's new email address.

 

You try to pay the babysitter via electronic transfer or PayPal.

 

You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

 

When your car is crashing through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the Back button.

 

Your desk collapses under the weight of your computer peripherals.

 

You want to meet someone new and your first impulse is to turn on your computer.

 

You double click your TV remote

 

You forget that you don't have to use your keyboard when using your telephone.

 

You try to enter your password on the microwave.

 

You have more than 5 email addresses.

 

You set up a Web page for each of your kids.

 

Your dog has its own home page too.

 

You use more than 20 passwords.

 

Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

 

If you can write a list like this.

 

If you immediately think of ten people to whom you want to send this list.

 

You come back and check this list every half-hour.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Latest Articles

  • Posts

    • Grumpy Bear
      Some Assembly is Required

      By Grumpy Bear · Posted

      Can it still be Assembled I?    Stribeck says that we need a certain amount of viscosity under conditions of load and velocity to prevent two surfaces of a know roughness from tearing each other asunder. And we have marketing trying to tell the masses that those two surfaced require less of that commodity due to more exact limits being placed on the same old clearances. We also know that there are limits to how hard something can before it becomes to brittle to be viable and to smooth to 'wet' the surface and that both of those conditions have been known and met since about the Second World War.    That viscosity value shook out at 10 centistokes at 212 F just under a hundred years ago.  Give this a look: [Anton Parr]     What is advertised is the Kinematic viscosity (mm2/s) or that which has been density adjusted but the value we are after is the dynamic viscosity (mPa.s) or true viscosity. You can see that this number is dependent on density thus base stock and temperature. You can also see that an SAE 30 doesn't reach that value in this example. However an SAE 30 that is at the upper end of the SAE 30 range; 12.5 cSt (mm2/s), might. 12.5 * .83 = 10.375 (mm2/s). If you could find an SAE 30 at the upper end these days.   Then there is the complication of viscosity modifiers or VII or VM, whatever you wish to call them. Polymers added to very thin base oils, perhaps 3 to 6 cP oils, that will meet the SAE *W30 spec at 'tested' shear rates and 100 C/212F  target temperature. So a polymer fortified base that is a fraction of the 10 cP requirement Stribeck insist upon.   This could be all well and good if those polymers didn't have two very problematic 'features'. They shear or loose viscosity both 1.) permanently and 2.) temporality. And they do both omitted in the advertised data with the distinct  purpose of deceiving the consumer of the actual operating state of the fluid. I've shown the example of Warren Oils COSTCO 10.91 cSt 5W30 formuation several times where the 100 C HTHS value is 6.9 cP!! That's the temporary shear down and with and SSI or shear stability index of 9.4 cSt. Note the intentional deception in using mixed units?    After a short while that 9.4 cSt oil has a viscosity corrected dynamic value of 7.8 cP. But as the SSI is still within the range of an SAE *W30 whose lower value is 9.3 cSt.    This allows them to continue to call this SAE 16 weight oil a 30 weight, the cake, and still meet the API requirements for fuel efficiency IMPROVEMENT mandated by the EPA. The eating of the cake. By the time you've worn out your motor doing the responsible thing by adhering to the warranty requirements, (the stick), you get deprived of the carrot, wear control. So sad, to bad.   So what can be done? Do I need actually say? [Anton Parr]       Even this must be monitored if the oil is on the low side and the VII an organic or you opt for a 0W40 with an even lighter base oil and more / higher MW VII. (Note the lower density of the 40 weight versus the SAE 30 mono-weight?)    There is another workaround. Temperature. An SAE *W30 run at a bulk temperature of between 180 and 195 F.    Being the belt and suspenders sort I am I do both. Run it cook and run it heavy.    In Part II I'll work the AW package. 
    • Atlas
      Wow I'm in a pickle. (Broke down truck) and a story.

      By Atlas · Posted

      So, do I go elbow-deep on this thing or list it for sale and play dumb? Seems to "runs good."   I'm about $1200 away from having: -a rebuilt injector ($300) -a new cat ($250) -a new cat back exhaust (OE style) ($300) -a new AC compressor ($200) -AC refrigerant charge ($150)   In theory, this should rectify the obvious detracting issues from its value and operability. Cold AC with a non-squeaking AC pulley both sounds and feels good. An exhaust that isn't cut/hacked in 17 different places and doesn't vibrate on a crossmember would make it sound and feel less janky. A working cat would help the stink, and will save the earth, but *if and only if* the fuel system is working properly, which would also address the intermittent "rich" CEL.   Heard a good one... CEL for "Rich condition" means you haven't spent enough money on the truck lately, and it's letting you know.   Rebuilding the injector would seem to be the most important part. Replacing the cat would be secondary. I don't think mine is plugged or overly restricted, but it might be a little restricted? I have no good way to tell other than seat of the pants feel. I hate the smell.   The current theory is I have a rich idle problem: A bad fuel pressure regulator, or a leaking injector(s) being the highest probabilities. I already replaced the FPR but that doesn't mean its replacement isn't also bad. It was a new part from Dorman, but the packaging looked like it had been sitting on a shelf for 20 years.   This is the (single) upstream O2 sensor shown at idle. I'm getting a lot of "rich" it seems. Sometimes it stays high like that and doesn't drop down. That makes me think it's processing injector leaks or a partially stuck open injector.     Other times it looks like this. Nice oscillations between rich and lean, which is what I think it should be. Under load and at speed, the oscillations are nice and tight and uniform looking, high and low.     Fuel trims suggest the PCM is compensating pretty hard at idle to pull fuel out. But it's not enough to trip a CEL. Something about slowing to a stop: brake vaccum booster, EGR, or the EVAP purge is delayed, or there's pooled fuel in the intake again that's draining into a cylinder is enough to set the CEL. Of course, in two days of driving, it hasn't set. I was hoping to actually look at the freeze-frame data when it sets. IAT is high because it's idling on an 83 degree day here.  
    • Another JR
      Gasser Subforum Has Been Quiet - - So, Regenerative Braking and Using L10

      By Another JR · Posted

      Have considered installing a DC to DC charger in your camper to replace your isolator?  
    • newdude
      Gas fill door

      By newdude · Posted

      Common failure.  You need to replace the fuel door housing.   The painted cover transfers over to the new housing.  To remove the old one there is 4 spots where you poke the plastic to release it.  
    • newdude
      Gasser Subforum Has Been Quiet - - So, Regenerative Braking and Using L10

      By newdude · Posted

      No such thing as regenerative braking on a pure ICE vehicle.     Regenerative braking is the re-capture of energy from electric motors and stores it in the battery pack.  So hybrids, PHEV and EVs have regenerative braking.     What you are seeing is the charging system changing modes is all.  Its likely entering charge mode for some sort of reason is all.  All of the charging modes will be listed below.   As for L10 vs D.  L10 turns off automatic grade braking.  L10 puts you in control of grade downshifts where in D it will automatically do it based on brake pedal position and other factors.  Otherwise L10 and D drive exactly the same aside from that one aspect.    Battery Sulfation Mode The BCM will enter this mode when the interpreted Generator output voltage is less than 13.2 V for 45 minutes. When this condition exists the BCM will enter Charge Mode for 2–3 minutes. The BCM will then determine which mode to enter depending on voltage requirements.   Charge Mode The BCM will enter Charge Mode when ever one of the following conditions are met:   Windshield wipers are ON for more than 3 s. Climate Control Voltage Boost Mode Request is true, as sensed by the HVAC control module via serial data. High speed cooling fan, rear defogger, and HVAC high speed blower operation can cause the BCM to enter the Charge Mode. The estimated battery temperature is less than 0°C (32°F). Battery State of Charge is less than 80%. Vehicle speed is greater than 145 km/h (90 mph) A current sensor malfunction exists. System voltage is determined to be below 12.56 V When any one of these conditions is met, the system will set targeted generator output voltage to a charging voltage between 13.9–15.5 V, depending on the battery state of charge and estimated battery temperature.   Fuel Economy Mode The BCM will enter Fuel Economy Mode when the estimated battery temperature is at least 0°C (32°F) but less than or equal to 80°C (176°F), the calculated battery current is less than 15 A and greater than −8 A, and the battery state-of-charge is greater than or equal to 80%. Its targeted generator output voltage is the open circuit voltage of the battery and can be between 12.5–13.1 V. When fuel economy mode is active, the generator is not charging, only maintaining open circuit battery voltage. The BCM will exit this mode and enter Charge Mode when any of the conditions described above are present.   Headlamp Mode The BCM will enter Headlamp Mode when ever the head lamps are ON (high or low beams). Voltage will be regulated between 13.9–14.5 V.   Start Up Mode When the engine is started the BCM sets a targeted generator output voltage of 14.5 V for 30 s.   Tow/Haul Mode (if applicable) Pressing the Tow/Haul Mode button located on the center stack, the vehicle system voltage is raised and the remote (non-vehicle) battery will be charged. Having the headlamps on will raise the system voltage and if the Tow/Haul button is applied it will not serve any purpose. The voltage is regulated between 13.9-14.5 V.      

  • GM-Trucks.com Clubs

  • Popular Contributors

×
×
  • Create New...