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A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the

loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel

of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated

back to 1803, which took the Lawyer three months to track down. After

sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply:


(Actual letter):

"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application,

we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we

compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the

application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the

proposed collateral property back to 1803. Before final approval can

be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its



Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows (actual letter):


"Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I

note that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years

covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated

person in this country, particularly those working in the property area,

would not know that Louisiana was purchased by the U.S. from France in

1803, the year of origin identified in our application. For the

edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior

to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired it by

Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain

by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named

Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a

new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella.


The good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful

about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing

of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus' expedition.


Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus

Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this

world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made

that part of the world called Louisiana.


God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back,

to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it AND the FHA.


I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we

have our d**n loan?"


The loan was approved.




I work for the government so it makes it even funnier. Amazing how crazy people can be about a simple form. I had a travel voucher sent back today where I was off by a penny in their favor, I had to redo the whole thing. Talk about a waste of money.

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