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Newbies "Lighter Side of Trucks" Forum  Page 4

Kansas Kid

By Kansas Kid
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NewbieZ71 Senior Enthusiast

NewbieZ71

Posted
Posted

Hacked into the Ford Design Files.....stole this..scheduled production 2004 if not sooner.....hey, at least the tires shouldnt disintegrate because of high speeds.....

 

 

newsuv.jpg

NewbieZ71 Senior Enthusiast

NewbieZ71

Posted
Posted
Wonder which way the braintrust at F*rd decided to hang the TP?   :thumbs:

The notes show that the TP option is only included on the upgrade "BM" model.....its also the only model with air conditioning and a side vent....go figure...

Kansas Kid Senior Enthusiast

Kansas Kid

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Some differences between Nixon and Clinton

 

Nixon: Watergate

Clinton: Waterbed

 

Nixon: His biggest fear - the Cold War

Clinton: His biggest fear - a Cold Sore

 

Nixon: Worried about carpet bombs

Clinton: Worried about carpet burns

 

Nixon: His Vice President was a Greek

Clinton: His Vice President was a geek

 

Nixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger

Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing her

 

Nixon: Couldn't explain the 18 minute gap in the Watergate tape

Clinton: Couldn't explain the 36-DD bra in his brief case

 

Nixon: His nickname was Tricky Dick

Clinton: same

 

Nixon: Ex-President

Clinton: Sex-President

 

Nixon: Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One"

Clinton: Known for women pointing at him saying, "He's the one!"

 

Nixon: Famous for his widow's peak

Clinton: Famous for fiddlin' with his peak

 

Nixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy

Clinton: Well acquainted with the G Spot

 

Nixon: Took on Ho Chi Min

Clinton: Took on Ho

 

Nixon: Talked about achieving peace with honor

Clinton: Talked about getting a piece while on her

NewbieZ71 Senior Enthusiast

NewbieZ71

Posted
Posted
It may just stink enough that I will not have to wory about anyone getting in my way  :thumbs:

Why thank you Smokey....notice that the jokes in Newbies Lighter Side of Trucks are relevant, timely and funny.  No dragging up old stuff about say PAST PRESIDENTS....  HEY KK GOT ANY LINCOLN JOKES????? HEY! A funny thing happened to Howard Taft on the way to the........

DigUout Senior Enthusiast

DigUout

Posted
Posted
The notes show that the TP option is only included on the upgrade "BM" model.....

If you have to upgrade to the "BM" model, than it'd be safe to say that the "Standard" F*rd guy is full of sh!t?

Kansas Kid Senior Enthusiast

Kansas Kid

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Bob and Mary were both patients in a mental

hospital.  One day while they were walking past the

hospital swimming pool, Bob suddenly jumped into the deep end.

 

He sunk to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.  Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and

pulled him out.  When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable.

 

When he went to tell Mary the news he said "Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses. The bad news is, Bob, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he's dead.

 

"Mary replied "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry."

Kansas Kid Senior Enthusiast

Kansas Kid

Posted
  • Author
Posted

The new doctor was leading his bunch of crazies around the grounds of the state hospital.As they went under the branchs of a large tree a large crow decided to turn loose and hit one of the patients right on the top of the head.The new doctor thinking this might cause trama hollered, "Everyone stay right here while I run back and get some toilet paper to clean that up!"  The crazies stood there for awhile and finally the one with the bird poop on his head said, "And they call us crazy!  By the time he gets back that bird will be miles away!"

NewbieZ71 Senior Enthusiast

NewbieZ71

Posted
Posted

NOTICE:

Newbies "Lighter Side of Trucks Forum" is a truck and automotive oriented forum.  All submissions should have SOMETHING to do with a 4 wheeled vehicle.  Even TWO wheel would be ok.  OK, OK, even if you have a UNICYCLE joke I will post it.....but PLEASE make it have SOMETHING to do with a form of transportation.

 

And dont make fun of crazy people.

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