Jump to content

Hell has frozen over...

Elwood 2000

By Elwood 2000
in The Off-Topic Bar

Recommended Posts

Elwood 2000 Senior Enthusiast

Elwood 2000

Posted
Posted

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.

 

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

 

Bonus Question: Is hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

 

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

 

One student, however, wrote the following:

 

First, we need to know how the mass of hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

 

As for how many souls are entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in h*ll to increase exponentially.

 

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the volume of hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

 

This gives two possibilities:

 

1. If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.

 

2. If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

 

So which is it?

 

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

 

The corollary of this theory is that since hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is, therefore, extinct ... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh, my God."

 

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

shorepatrol2 Enthusiast

shorepatrol2

Posted
Posted
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.

 

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

 

Bonus Question: Is hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

 

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

 

One student, however, wrote the following:

 

First, we need to know how the mass of hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

 

As for how many souls are entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in h*ll to increase exponentially.

 

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the volume of hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

 

This gives two possibilities:

 

1. If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.

 

2. If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

 

So which is it?

 

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

 

The corollary of this theory is that since hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is, therefore, extinct ... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh, my God."

 

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

 

 

 

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ZZebes Senior Enthusiast

ZZebes

Posted
Posted

Dear god, i wish i could be that much of a smart ass. thats almost as good as the kid who answered the entire test with "Because you said so"

Wingnut Senior Enthusiast

Wingnut

Posted
Posted
Dear god, i wish i could be that much of a smart ass. thats almost as good as the kid who answered the entire test with "Because you said so"

 

 

 

 

Dude...I AM that much of a smart ass, and I've done crap like that on tests (when I didn't know what the hell I was talking about), and the result is NEVER "the only A".

 

It's more like you get the paper back torn in two with a note "never take another class of mine".

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Latest Articles

  • Posts

    • newdude
      Where is the Ambient Air Temperature Sensor on a 2021 Chevy Suburban?

      By newdude · Posted

      Yea that's pretty normal to be off a few degrees.  Usually 2-4 degrees from say a weather app or thermometer.  
    • studly
      Where is the Ambient Air Temperature Sensor on a 2021 Chevy Suburban?

      By studly · Posted

      I just replaced the ambient air temperature sensor.  Easy as pie. I simply had to remove about 10-12 clips on the plastic cover over the radiator and remove two T-10 torx screws on the hood release lever to liberate the cover (Amazingly, none of the clips broke.  All came out and went back in with zero problems). Once the cover was removed, the temp sensor is easily accessible. The sensor cable snakes through a few guides and can be pulled out for even easier access to the sensor. I was able to work the sensor out of the mounting hole.  There is a red sliding catch on the plug that must be pulled back to disconnect the cable.  The plug was quite tight.  I had to use a screwdriver to pry it out. I plugged in the new sensor ($6.45 from RockAuto), snapped it into the mounting hole and re-snaked the cable. I put the radiator cover back on and reattached the lever arm to the hood release.  All done!     I started up my Suburban.  The temperature read 82 °F. Other thermometers at my house read 80 °F.  Close enough.  It might be reading high as my vehicle was sitting in the sun.
    • StingerZ16
      Navigating senior years.

      By StingerZ16 · Posted

      Remember when you were 50 and they called you Old Man?
    • Atlas
      Wow I'm in a pickle. (Broke down truck) and a story.

      By Atlas · Posted

      That one looks decent for the price   BUT..I want something that also supports OBDI/1.5. A lot of the prosumer-grade scanners don't have legacy support in order to keep costs low. I believe the Autel does if you go higher end with them.   For fun, I reached out to a local Snap-On rep because I was interested in the 2600. $1895 MSRP, says he can do $1595. That's still a lot, but then again, that's not a horrible discount for just asking out of the blue. Could probably do better if I was a regular buying off his truck, but I'm not.   Not sure if I mentioned but I didn't realize with USED scanners from Snap On that you need to make sure a) the serial number isn't flagged as stolen. On the newer ones, SnapOn can remotely disable the device if it's flagged in their system. And, customer service can tell you if it is, if you're thinking about buying used. B) Make sure it's paid off. If the seller still owes money to the truck or if they financed through Snap On, the device can be remotely disabled until the balance is paid. It's less clear if SnapOn will tell you if a balance is still owed; I didn't make it that far with the used model I was considering. I did read that SnapOn has no way of tracking any "truck financing" deals between the SnapOn rep and buyer, only if they financed through corporate. So there's that extra caution needed.   Still waffling on whether I go with a ~$500ish Autel/TopDon or spend bigger money. The value seems to be in the prosumer brands. I'm not giving them enough credit TBH, actual production repair shops use them daily BUT I'm still allergic to certain kinds of underdog products trying to unseat American companies with solid reputations. SnapOn's scanner isn't wholly made in the US, but it is assembled here and they have US support and probably the most proven/ robust legacy support.   Something to think about. Value, or principles? There's a $1k difference.
    • Atlas
      Winter Returned

      By Atlas · Posted

      I'm thankful to live where we don't have extreme weather. We might all be blown to smithereens when Mt. Rainier goes, but 80 is warm enough in the summer and I can generally count the number of hard freezes in the winter on one hand. The cars here don't rust and they don't get sun-baked, either.   We have finished off many of our average 52 days of "clear/sunny" weather, though. Sunsets are coming earlier, the nights are a little cooler. It's right around the first week of September when we get our first warning that summer is coming to a close with overcast skies and the start of "hoodie weather" temperatures during the cooler parts of the day. By October, it's usually time to ditch the shorts. By November, it's mostly raining.

  • GM-Trucks.com Clubs

  • Popular Contributors

×
×
  • Create New...