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For Those Of You Not From Texas


Zembonez

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Posted

A little Texas Humor... and a few actual facts.

 

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas .

 

Need to be cheered up?

 

Happy, Texas 79042

Pep , Texas 79353

Smiley , Texas 78159

Paradise , Texas 76073

Rainbow , Texas 76077

Sweet Home , Texas 77987

Comfort , Texas 78013

Friendship, Texas 76530

 

Love the Sun?

 

Sun City , Texas 78628

Sunrise , Texas 76661

Sunset, Texas 76270

Sundown, Texas 79372

Sunray , Texas 79086

Sunny Side , Texas 77423

 

Want something to eat?

 

Bacon , Texas 76301

Noodle , Texas 79536

Oatmeal , Texas 78605

Turkey , Texas 79261

Trout , Texas 75789

Sugar Land , Texas 77479

Salty, Texas 76567

Rice , Texas 75155

And top it off with:

Sweetwater , Texas 79556

 

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!

 

Detroit , Texas 75436

Colorado City , Texas 79512

Denver City , Texas 79323

Klondike , Texas 75448

Nevada , Texas 75173

Memphis , Texas 79245

Miami , Texas 79059

Boston , Texas 75570

Santa Fe , Texas 77517

Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861

Reno , Texas 75462

 

Feel like traveling outside the country? Don't bother buying a plane ticket!

 

Athens , Texas 75751

Canadian, Texas 79014

China , Texas 77613

Egypt , Texas 77436

Ireland , Texas 76538

Turkey , Texas 79261

London , Texas 76854

New London , Texas 75682

Paris , Texas 75460

 

No need to travel to Washington D.C.

 

Whitehouse , Texas 75791

 

We even have a city named after our planet!

 

Earth , Texas 79031

 

And a city named after our State!

 

Texas City , Texas 77590

 

Exhausted?

 

Energy , Texas 76452

 

Cold?

 

Blanket , Texas 76432

 

Winters, Texas

 

Like to read about History?

 

Santa Anna , Texas

 

Goliad , Texas

 

Alamo , Texas

 

Gun Barrel City, Texas

 

Robert lee, Texas

 

Need Office Supplies?

 

Staples, Texas 78670

 

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus , Texas 76084

 

You guessed it..it's on the state line..

 

Texline , Texas 79087

 

For the kids...

 

Kermit , Texas 79745

Elmo , Texas 75118

Nemo , Texas 76070

Tarzan , Texas 79783

Winnie , Texas 77665

Sylvester , Texas 79560

 

Other city names in Texas , to make you smile.....

 

Frognot , Texas 75424

Bigfoot , Texas 78005

Hogeye , Texas 75423

Cactus , Texas 79013

Notrees , Texas 79759

Best, Texas 76932

Veribest , Texas 76886

Kickapoo , Texas 75763

Dime Box , Texas 77853

Old Dime Box , Texas 77853

Telephone , Texas 75488

Telegraph , Texas 76883

Whiteface , Texas 79379

Twitty, Texas 79079

 

And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City

 

Kilgore , Texas 75662

 

And our favorites...

 

Cut n Shoot, Texas

Gun Barrell City , Texas

Hoop And Holler, Texas

Ding Dong, Texas and, of course,

Muleshoe , Texas

 

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .

 

1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles

 

2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles

 

3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas

 

4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos , July 4, 1883.

 

5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water.

 

6. The Heisman Trophy ws named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston .

 

7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America .

 

8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.

 

9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.

 

10. The worst natural disaster in U.S . history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island .

 

11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was ' Houston .'

 

12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island .

 

13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43' in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979.

 

14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.

 

15. A Live Oak (known as Big Tree) near Fulton is estimated to be over 1000 years old.

 

16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.

 

17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper.

 

18. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston , Velasco, West Columbia and Austin .

 

19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U.S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).

 

20. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas .

 

21. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).

 

22. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston .

Posted

I suppose I'll have to go to Texas some day to see what all the raving is about.Really that good huh? I need to get outa Ca. all everyone wants is your $. :D

Posted
I suppose I'll have to go to Texas some day to see what all the raving is about.Really that good huh? I need to get outa Ca. all everyone wants is your $. :D

Texas has its problems just like any other place but it is a really unique place to be. I've been almost all over the United States (seen some of 32 states I believe) and I have to say it's a little DIFFERENT living here!

Posted

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas...Check

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas...Check

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas...Check

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in TexasCheck, Corpus Christi FTMFW

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas...Does anyone measure in miles?

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas...Check

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas...Parent's house

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas...Girlfriend has used them

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas...One speeding ticket and one warning to prove this one

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas...Check

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas...Wait, I've never lived in Texas

 

I love Texas though, just hate that fact there is no public land, where in the hell are you supposed to go hunting and fishing???

Posted
I suppose I'll have to go to Texas some day to see what all the raving is about.Really that good huh? I need to get outa Ca. all everyone wants is your $. :seeya:

Texas has its problems just like any other place but it is a really unique place to be. I've been almost all over the United States (seen some of 32 states I believe) and I have to say it's a little DIFFERENT living here!

 

 

 

I got to visit the lonestar state last december for vacation. It is true, Everything is bigger in Texas :D

Posted
Dime Box , Texas 77853

Old Dime Box , Texas 77853

I don't live too far from there. I go hunting and fishing with a friend there all the time.

 

just hate that fact there is no public land, where in the hell are you supposed to go hunting and fishing???
What?
Posted

I have a good friend who lives in Texas, and to know him and talk to him, he is Texas. Loves life, has a hearty laugh and is always willing to share a beer.

 

We were in Scotland a year or so ago, and the announcer was calling out different places in the world, and when he got to where you were from, you would cheer out. We all know what I am talking about. Well, the announcer had pretty much covered most of the countries on this earth, and he asked if he had missed anywhere. Well and Grover calls out in a larger then life voice "TEXAS, you forgot TEXAS". It was a good laugh, but that is how he was. He loved his state and was not shy about it.

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