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Things to say at work?

gandolphxx

By gandolphxx
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gandolphxx Senior Enthusiast

gandolphxx

Posted
Posted

PHRASES YOU WISH YOU COULD SAY AT WORK

 

1. Ahhh...I see the ****-up fairy has visited again.

 

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

 

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

 

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

 

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

 

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

 

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

 

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

 

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

 

10. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of &&&&.

 

11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

 

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

 

13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a dang.

 

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

 

15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

 

16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of

view.

 

17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

 

18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

 

19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

 

20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

 

21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

 

22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

 

23. No, my powers can only be used for good.

 

24. You sound reasonable...Time to up the medication.

 

25. Who me? I just wander from room to room.

NewbieZ71 Senior Enthusiast

NewbieZ71

Posted
Posted

One from me...a quote from one of my co workers...."you know how much money Newbie earned last year?  No, how much..?...

 

About half of it......

Guest Friz

Guest Friz

Posted
Posted

My favorite,

"Your Village called. Their idiot is missing."

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