Ways to describe an idiot

[JAFO]

Sad thing is I recognize a lot of these people!  #50 is my favorite!

 

1. A few fries short of a happy meal.

2. The wheel is spinning but the hamster is dead.

3. A few bricks shy of a full load.

4. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with the instructions on the heel.

5. Fell out of the stupid tree and hit all of the branches on the way down.

6. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.

7. Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.

8. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.

9. Forgot to pay his brain bill.

10. A few clowns short of a circus.

11. If he had another brain it would be lonely.

12. Too much yardage between the goal posts.

13. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.

14. A few beers short of a six-pack.

15. Dumber than a box of hair.

16. A few peas short of a casserole.

17. Doesn't have all his corn flakes in one bowl.

18. One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.

19. One taco short of a combination plate.

20. A few feathers short of a whole duck.

21. All foam no beer.

22. The cheese slid off of his cracker.

23. Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.

24. Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt.

25. Warning: objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.

26. An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.

27. As smart as bait.

28. Chimney's clogged.

29. Her sewing machine is out of thread.

30. His antenna doesn't get all of the channels.

31. Missing a few buttons on the remote control.

32. No grain in the silo.

33. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.

34. His belt doesn't go through all the loops.

35. Receiver is off the hook.

36. Several nuts short of a full pouch.

37. Skylight leaks a little.

38. Slinky's kinked.

39. Surfing in Nebraska.

40. In the pinball game of life, his flippers are a little too far apart.

41. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

42. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.

43. A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

44. A photographic memory, but with the lens cover glued on.

45. A prime candidate for natural de-selection.

46. One-celled organisms outscore him in IQ tests.

47. Fell out of the family tree.

48. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train

isn't coming.

49. Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out

looking for it.

50. He's so dense, light bends around him.

51. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.

52. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.

53. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.

54. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.

[gandolphxx]

Dumb as a box of rocks

[sincityZ71]

not the swiftest canoe in the rapids

[General Lee 01]

Somebody's been watching the Weakest link.

 

He's 2 legs short of a deer in headlights.

 

He's a couple inches short of a Leprechaun.

 

The engine is running, the Transmition is in Drive, but his brain is going 0.0 mph.

[Jpshostr]

How about

 

 

General Lee (aka idiot boy)

[Beaux Duke]

Not the brightest bulb on the tree

[Vortec5.3]

 

           

[Guest Friz]

He hasn't seen the ball since kick-off.

[MountaineerTom]

Good one froma guy at work.

 

Dumber than a bucket of smashed a**holes.

 

LOL

[Instrument 37]

Too much chlorine in that gene pool