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A CHICAGOAN IN H3LL

RyanbabZ71

By RyanbabZ71
in The Off-Topic Bar

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RyanbabZ71 Senior Enthusiast

RyanbabZ71

Posted
Posted

A CHICAGOAN IN ####

>

> A Chicagoan dies and is sent to ####. He had been a horrible man

> throughout life and even the devil wanted to punish him, so he puts

him

to

> work breaking up rocks with a sledgehammer. To make it worse he

cranks

up

> the temperature and the humidity. "Love my kingdom!" laughs the

devil.

>

> After a couple of days the devil checks in on his victim to see if he

is

> suffering adequately. The devil is aghast as he looks at the

Chicagoan

> happily swinging his hammer and whistling a happy tune. The devil

walks

> up to him and says, "I don't understand this. I've turned the heat

way

> up, it's humid, you're crushing rocks; why are you so happy?"

>

> The Chicagoan, smiling big, looks at the devil and replies, "This is

> great! It reminds me of August in Chicago. Hot, humid, a good place to

work.

> It reminds me of home. This is fantastic!"

>

> The devil, extremely perplexed, walks away to ponder the Chicagoan's

> remarks. Then he decides to drop the temperature, send down driving

> rain and torrential wind. Soon, #### is a wet, muddy mess. Walking

in

mud

> up to his knees with dust blowing into his eyes, the Chicagoan is

happily

> slogging through the mud pushing a wheelbarrow full of crushed rocks.

> Again, the devil asks how he can be happy in such conditions.

>

> The Chicagoan replies, "This is great! Just like April in Chicago.

It

> reminds me of working out in the fields with spring planting!"

>

> The devil is now completely baffled. Angry, and desperate to make

####

> really ####, he tries one last ditch effort. He makes the temperature

> plummet. Suddenly #### is blanketed in snow and ice. Confident that

this

> will surely make the Chicagoan unhappy, the devil checks in on the

> Chicagoan. He is again aghast at what he sees. The Chicagoan is

dancing,

> singing, and twirling his sledgehammer as he cavorts in glee.

>

> "How can you be so happy? Don't you know its 40 below zero!?" screams

> the devil.

>

> Jumping up and down the Chicagoan throws a snowball at the devil and

> yells, "####'s frozen over!! This means the Cubs won the World

Series!!!

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