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Blond Joke


dlstewart01

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Posted

This blond was telling her good friend about getting a tattoo. her friend ask her what did you get and where. She said, I got a seashell tattooed on my inner thigh. Her friend said, why did you get it put there. The blond replied, Well when you put your ear to it you can smell the ocean. :thumbs::D:D

Posted

My wife and I are watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we are in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No." She answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" Yes." She replied. Then I said, " I'd like to phone a friend."

 

That's the last thing I remember.

Posted
My wife and I are watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we are in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No." She answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" Yes." She replied. Then I said, " I'd like to phone a friend."

 

That's the last thing I remember.

 

:D:D

Posted

this blond driving down a back road and looks off to side and sees another blond off in field rowing a row boat! She is like WTF? Stops her car get out runs to the side of the road and starts yelling to the blond rowing WTf are you doing? the other blond in the boat says go eff your self! The blond on the side of the road says what? The blond in the boat is like you heard me go eff your self you stupid whore!!! Now the blond on the side of the is is getting pissed but keeps her cool and yells you know its blonds like you that give blonds like me a bad name! The blond in the boat yells back suck a D. Now the blond on the side of the road is fuming and screams IF I COULD SWIM I WOULD KICK YOUR ASS BITCH!!!!!!!! :D

Posted

As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.

 

The trucker lowers the window, and Alaska Blonde says "Hi, my name is Heather and

you are losing some of your load." The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.

 

When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door.

 

Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the Alaska Blonde says brightly, "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

 

Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All

out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door.

 

 

The trucker lowers the window. Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

 

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says... "Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter in Alaska, and I'm driving a SALT TRUCK!"

Posted

Did you hear about the blonde who was shopping in Wallmart when she saw a shiny cylindrical object?

Intrigued, she asked a sale associate about it.

"Its a Thermos" he replied.

She, " What's it do?"

He, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold."

Awe struck, she bought it. The next day she took it to work and set it on her desk.

The boss walked by, saw it, and asked " What's that thing?"

"Why its a Thermos, it keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold."

He, " what have you got in it?

She, " chicken soup and a couple of popsicles."

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

How do you confuse a blonde?

.

.

Take her to the oval office and tell her to sit in the corner.

---------------------------------------------------------

How do you drown a blonde?

.

.

Put a scrach n' sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool!

---------------------------------------------------------

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

.

.

5...

.

.

1 to hold the bulb, and 4 to spin the ladder!

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