Idiots

[Guest Friz]

IDIOTS IN SERVICE

This week, our phones went dead and I had to contact the telephone repair people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m. and 7:00p.m. When I asked if they could give me a smaller time frame the pleasant gentleman asked, "Would you like us to call you before we come?" I replied that I didn't see how he would be able to do that since our phones weren't working. He also requested that we report future outages by email (Does YOUR email work without a telephone line?).

IDIOTS AT WORK

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed  I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed  me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her.

She carefully compared the signature to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too many deer were being hit by cars and she didn't want them to cross there anymore.

IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.

IDIOT SIGHTING #1

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?"

She smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."

IDIOT SIGHTING #2

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with a coworker of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?"

IDIOT SIGHTING #3

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who is leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

IDIOT SIGHTING #5

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried

the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."

 

Now don't you feel better.

 

Remember this; Danger is nature's way of eliminating stupid people. If we continue to make our world safe, we are doomed to become a race of idiots.

[Kania2k1]

Nice man, Stupidity should be painfull!  And never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups either!

[RyanbabZ71]

IDIOT SIGHTING #5

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried

the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."

 

Haha this actually kinda happened to my dad.  They got my moms blazer fixed a few months ago (4wd switch) and they called to say it was ready.  He went to pick it up and the service mgr couldnt find the keys   Everyone was flipping out and the parts guy (my dad knew) said he would be right back.  Then my dad finally got someone to spll the beans.  They thought he was coming to pick it up after hrs so they locked the keys in the truck   the parts guy was cutting a key.  However my dad pulled out his spare and went on his way.  Why didnt they ask if he had a spare???

[elboberino]

IDIOTS AT WORK

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed  I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed  me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her.

She carefully compared the signature to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

 

Me and my mom have both done this in front of cashiers, but I signed my card while I was checking out.  But since the space on the card they give you for your signature is so small, it looked nothing like the one I did on the nice, big area on the receipt.

 

Remember: Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity

                           -Snatch