Joke Thread

[Grumpy Bear]

10 hours ago, MaverickZ71 said:

 

My car has a BW Super T-10.  Funny thing is, Pontiac still used the RPO code of M21, which led some to think it was the old Rock Crusher, until they discovered it didn't whine and it shifted more smoothly. 

 

Ah, the whine of a Rock Crusher. Give me some straight cut gears.  

[MaverickZ71]

I had a joke about Covid but there's a 99.98% chance you won't get it.

[diyer2]

 

[customboss]

13 hours ago, MaverickZ71 said:

Definition

 

they
pronoun

ˈt͟hā 

: used to refer to people in a general way or to a group of people who are not specified

You know what they say.
People can do what they want.
They say the trial could go on for weeks.
He's as lazy as they come.

Oh you left out the meant meaning as you continue to promote right wing BS here “They” = ANYONE that DISAGREES WITH YOU. 

[diyer2]

 

[diyer2]

 

[MaverickZ71]

27 minutes ago, diyer2 said:

 

Uphill, both ways.

[MaverickZ71]

When my daughter was a teenager, she said, "Dad, how do you know when you're in love?"

 

I said, "You'll know, I promise!."

 

She said, "When did it happen to you then?"

 

I said, "Well, I was in this bar when a group of girls came in. 

 

One was stunning with a gorgeous figure and a beautiful smile. She looked straight into my eyes and that was it. 

 

Then, cupid appeared on my shoulder and drew back his bow and fired a shot at her. 

 

Unfortunately, he missed and hit your mother."

[MaverickZ71]

The other day I was on my way to work, and I had to pee, so I stopped at a convenience store to use their restroom. 

 

I was standing there at the urinal and my pee went in several different directions. Up the wall, down my leg, in my boots and all over the guy standing at the urinal next to me.

 

Embarrassed, I apologized and quickly left. I drove straight to my doctor's office and demanded that they see me right away. 

 

They immediately took me back, and after my examination, the Doctor said,

“Extraordinary! I've never seen anything like that. “Holes man! You’ve got holes in your penis, that’s why you’re urinating everywhere.”

 

Shocked, I asked him what am I supposed to do? How can I live life like this? 

 

He reassured me.

“Don't worry he said, this is the address and phone number of my sister, she’ll be able to help you.”

 

“Oh is she a special surgeon or something?” I asked.

 

“No,” he said, “She plays the clarinet for the Boston Symphony Orchestra, she’ll show you where to put your fingers.”

[diyer2]

 

[diyer2]

Proof of the ******.

 

[MaverickZ71]

The amount of people who confuse “to” and “too” is just amazing two me.

[Grumpy Bear]

2 minutes ago, MaverickZ71 said:

The amount of people who confuse “to” and “too” is just amazing two me.

 

I do it all the time.  

[MaverickZ71]

Remember the good ol days when you'd charge one of these and toss it to a Freshman in Shop Class? 

[Grumpy Bear]

12 minutes ago, MaverickZ71 said:

Remember the good ol days when you'd charge one of these and toss it to a Freshman in Shop Class? 

 

Maybe