Jump to content

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 3.3k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted

Fred was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young
pullets, and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs

He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot
and was replaced.

This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached
them to his roosters.

Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance,
which rooster was performing.

Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by
just listening to the bells.

Fred's favourite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but
this morning he noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all!

When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy
chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the
roosters coming, would run for cover.

To Fred's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it
couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to
the next one.

Fred was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the City Show and he
became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell
Piece Prize," but they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making.

Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most
coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the
unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren't paying
attention.

Vote carefully in the next election, you can't always hear the bells.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Posted

There is a Chevy joke in there as well ... 

 

 

 

  • Haha 2
Posted

 This video may not be the exact content for the joke thread but its a lot of laughs so here it is, I've only watched a portion of it so far but if anyone is looking for some light hearted good soap box driving action, its here. As a note in the upper left of the screen it shows the number out of 100 to refer back to any particular vehicle for comment !. 

 

https://www.facebook.com/reel/1351928276956715

Posted (edited)

I thought my dryer was shrinking my clothes.

Turns out it was the refrigerator.

 

 Bear saunters into home and heads straight for fridge, like a hungry ...

Edited by Grumpy Bear
  • Haha 4
Posted

FOR MEN ONLY .... however we love our women so much lol 

 

What costs more, a woman or a swimming pool? ... I would say there is no difference, both are expensive for the time spent in them....😂

 

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Latest Articles

  • Posts

    • tl; dr I've now reached the 6th floor of hell. I'm chronicling my journey for my morning readers.   Pulling the top of the intake apart was moderately easy but it involved a lot of parts, connections, and minutae. I was preparing for the new fuel lines to arrive ("nut and bolt kit" it's called). The fuel line connections are notched and held in place by the manifold and a metal plate with a T27 screw.   It's on the back of the intake, under the firewall, with little clearance, and two hard metal fuel lines in the way. I was using Franken-tools (weird combinations of 1/4 inch ratchet with/without an extension, with a bit holder for my T27) to get in there. One of my sockets and bits fell off and has yet to emerge on the floor. I lost a second setup and that's when I almost started throwing tools. But that was the point at which I had gotten traction on the Torx head, and it promptly stripped. No more traction.   I started humming "1-877-kars-4-kids" because I was about at that point. You know what? I'm $1500 into this thing and I can make it disappear just as quickly. This isn't fun anymore. I had spent a lot of time already "tidying" around the engine bay: Fixing all the "someone's been here before!" BS. The truck has been exclusively dealer- and shop- serviced and I'm reminded of why I never let other people work on my cars unless absolutely necessary.   Speaking of dealer service. This truck has a 1" stack of records going back to 1995. I put them all in an excel spreadsheet, date/mileage/description.   The CPI spider has been replaced 4 times in 85k miles. The EGR? Another 4. Multiple, multiple O2 sensors. One Cat. 4? Sets of plugs and wires, and I swear half the stack is diagnosis paperwork for "misfire, runs rough, extended crank, dies at stoplights".   GM was producing some proper crap back then. And it was still well within the era of brittle/crappy plastic. (Windows 95 was released the same month this truck was sold new, we HAD the technology!!)   There (was) a plastic shroud around the evaporator core and HVAC fan in the engine bay. I noticed a chunk of it missing so I poked at it some more and it literally shattered. Touched it some more and pieces were crumbling off. Had a good laugh. Clearly whatever plastic garbage they were using had broken down over 30 years and was literally turning to dust. That was a good half hour of using a shop vac to remove the rest of it.   Back to it.   I was going to give up for the evening but then decided I'm already level 10 pissed off at the stripped screw: G* D* it, give me my tools back -- and my JOY. We'll do this the hard way: The whole intake is coming off.   Blazer won Round II. After finally finding and accessing the 12 intake bolts and using a pry bar to unseat it from the heads, it popped loose in an explosion of gunk and grime raining down into open ports. Awesome.   6 times I reminded myself: Be careful of the temperature sender on the front of the intake.   YEAH, I forgot again and snapped it clean off in the removal. Add another $20 to the ever-growing list of new parts this thing is consuming.   The shame is, long before removing the intake, I had changed the oil in prep for Tuesday's momentous fuel line replacement that was going to be the magic fix and I'd have a running Blazer to tool around in this next weekend. The intake removal, including raining gunk, also gushed dirty coolant all over the valley. Of course it did. Welp, there goes another $35.   I now need an intake gasket set, bolt set, coolant temp sensor, another 5 quarts of oil, some RTV. Don't worry, I've already got 3 new jugs of Dexcool and a thermostat waiting. I'll fill it with clean water first to get it running, dump it, and then add the Dex later on in case... well, let's not go there. I'm only tearing this down once, next time the truck is going on Marketplace for FREE.   Oh, and I'm going to need vacuum hose for all the stupid connections placed at the rear of the engine which have since disintegrated. Come on, GM....tell me you don't do that anymore?   Oh, and the ears on the distributor where the cap screws down are both cracked. I mean, why not put a new distributor in it too. You get a distributor, YOU get a distributor, Everyone gets a new distributor!   This truck isn't out of the woods yet...I'm already questioning how much more time I'm willing to sink in.
    • NewDude, thank you for the suggestions!    I did follow up and the dealer indicates he has an open CX case and is working with DPAC (Dealer Parts Assistance Center).   Per the dealer, GM has had a quality spill and is not providing an update for when a replacement engine will be available.
    • That's interesting.   There was a factory wire-hole in the back, top of the rear cab, which had a wire for the third brakelight assembly running through it, as well as several holes (10 of them I believe) for all of the studs coming off of the 3rd brakelight assembly itself.   I sealed all of those holes with RTV/silicone as well.   I found it kind of odd, that none of those holes, were sealed with any kind of sealant by the factory - if there was any there, it wasn't very much.   That said, I've been out in heavy rain and have ran the truck through high-pressure car-washes a few times now and she has been 100% water-tight to this point.   I feel very confident in the repair, we'll see how it holds up.
    • I bought a used 2022 2500hd with 6.6L in February. In March took a 2200 mile trip towing our 6500 lb trailer. Changed the oil day before leaving and when we were arriving at our 1st destination, low oil light came on (roughly 1000 miles) it was 2 qts low. Now it towed like a dream, no issue there, and we did go through the mountains of TN, but still, 2 qts! Luckily I did purchase an extended warranty. Brought it to the dealership in April, oil change and consumption test. Brought it back last week, 1300 miles, no towing, and no oil showing on the dipstick. GM is reccomending a new engine (cheaper than them rebuilding), we'll see if the warranty company comes through. 
    • T3's and Ibuprofen. I do have a cryotherapy unit (ice machine) and a lift chair that will allow me to raise my legs above my heart.  There are topicals that I can use once the wound is fully healed.  
  • GM-Trucks.com Clubs

  • Popular Contributors

×
×
  • Create New...